Aren't bridal registries just a glamourized way to panhandle for gifts? Explain.?
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∞Infinity∞
Yahoo User
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 Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 8:14 pm Post subject: |
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| I agree in some ways. It's panhandling if they only register for really expensive things and the people they invite can't afford the stuff. You still get what you get in a lot of ways. If you are going to give a gift to someone, you might as well make it something you know they want or need, right? That's why I like bridal registries. If I'm invited to a wedding or a shower, I always look to see if they have a registry somewhere because I hate the idea of them not liking what I give.I do think it's tacky when people register for their birthdays or other occasions like graduation. That's panhandling in my opinion. |
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Brutally Honest
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 8:16 pm Post subject: |
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| I disagree with you completely. "You get what you get" went out with people moving out LONG before they got married. MOST people today are getting married much later, and therefore have entire households set up already. My husband didn't get married until he was THIRTY-SIX...we had to combine TWO households...which left us with not needing a 3rd, 4th or even a 5th toaster, among other things!Bridal registries are a FABULOUS idea. It saves the couple multitudes of hours of having to return or exchange the 27 toasters and the 15 blenders they got. It saves the guests a TON of angst over "geee...I wonder if they'll like it/need it."AND it saves the family members of the couple HUNDREDS of hours going through countless lists of stuff that the couple would want. I mean, after all, you're not SUPPOSED to discuss such atrocities as what the COUPLE might want (let alone where they're registered!) with the COUPLE. Registries are an all-around TIME SAVER!!But hey -- don't like a registry? Then give the universally appreciated gift of CASH. |
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~jen~
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 8:17 pm Post subject: |
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| No it's not. Registries are a way to let people know what you need for your new home. A lot of people don't know what to get a new bride & groom, so they are a good way to let people know what it is you need instead of them getting you something you don't like or need. |
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Invisigoth
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 8:27 pm Post subject: |
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| the gift registry is the couple's way of telling the people who will be getting them gifts what they need or want.You don't have to buy from the registry and you don't have to get them a gift at all. Personally, I'd rather give the couple a personal gift if I know them very well or at the very least, something that I knew they wanted. |
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Mrs B 8-16-08
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 8:35 pm Post subject: |
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| Not necessarily. It basically helps out the gift givers so they don't have to stress over what to get the couple (I'm one of those who needs guidance on giving, so these registries help me greatly). And 'you get what you get' is not such a good philosophy. What if they get 6 of one particular item. What if they get something absolutely horrid and/or that they have no use for. The giver has essentially wasted their money. |
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OZZIEGAL
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 8:50 pm Post subject: |
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| what happened to getting what you get is the retail industry trying very hard to ensure they get the most they can of all the wedding monies spent. a registry is a way for them to entice you into their stores, to enroll perhaps buy, and very definitely to get your wedding guests to buy from that store.a registry is a good idea as far as it gives people ideas as to your wants and needs as well as your taste, [something your attendants, parents, siblings used to do for you], and that is needed as more and more brides and grooms invite everyone they know from mere acquaintances at the coffee shop to co-workers, to neighbours to close friends and family. then mummy and daddy use the wedding as a business 'thing' and invite everyone they've done business with and you end up with people you don't know at your wedding! hence the gift registry.i don't think you would call it panhandling by the bride and groom as much as you would call it panhandling by the retailer! |
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JM
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 9:24 pm Post subject: |
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| Yes and no. I believe that people are going to give you gifts anyway so they might as well know what you want and what you need. As a guest I love being able to check out a list and buy someone what they want for their shower. There is no law that says you have to buy off of it. I always give cash for the wedding present but the registry does make gift giving easier for all involved. |
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erica f
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 9:50 pm Post subject: |
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| Who wants to return all those 'gest what you get' presents |
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Sarah May
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 10:03 pm Post subject: |
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| Why give a gift that a couple will not use or need? Registries were probably more relevant when couples were starting a home of their own. Because many people use to live at home until the got married. You never have to stick to a registry. You can get any gift you want. And if you hate sooooo much don't do it . |
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boomer gal
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 10:18 pm Post subject: |
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| I guess you could look at it that way, but that is not how I see it. Since I am going to be giving a gift anyway, I would much prefer to purchase a gift that the couple would actually like to receive. If I see something else that I think would be a perfect gift, I don't feel bound to use the registry. But I don't always know peoples' personal taste that well, so it is nice to have suggestions to fall back on. |
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melouofs
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 10:45 pm Post subject: |
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| IMO, no. I find them very helpful, and always buy from the registry when attending a shower or wedding. I'm glad to know the gift I have spent my hard earned money on is something the couple actually wants, and will be used. I'd hate to think my gift sat in a closet for years because it just didn't suit their needs. Also, though I am aware one shouldn't expect a gift, I don't know of anyone who would honestly show up to a wedding without one. Is anyone really kidding anyone here? I think if you go to a wedding without a gift--even something just small as a token, you really shouldn't go at all. |
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Challenge
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 11:09 pm Post subject: |
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| No. People are going to purchase gifts in celebration of your wedding. So, it is a good idea to let them know what gift you will like. |
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Fluff S
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 11:14 pm Post subject: |
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| bridal registries are a great way for the bride and groom to select items they need, and for guests that are stuck for ideas to be able to bring a gift rather than give cash. It allows the bride and groom the flexibility to exchange duplicate gifts, and allows the guests to choose from a wide range of prices that suit their own budget. It also helps to eliminate the bride and groom from receiving 7 toasters etc etc You still 'get what you get' but this way, the giver gives knowing their gift will be well received, and the givee doesn't feel an obligation to utilize something they have no use for. |
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Chrys
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Sun Jan 27, 2008 12:02 am Post subject: |
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| Actually - most guests prefer a registry. A registry is intended to let guests know what the bride needed for things like bridal showers - where arriving without a gift is highly inappropriate. After all, the point of a shower it to shower the bride with gifts.Many people choose to purchase wedding gifts from the registry as well. Wedding gifts are never required, but most people want to get something anyway and the majority of your guests would rather get you something they know you will use, enjoy and not already have. The guests who don't want to use it, won't - and that's fine to.Why register and not just "get what you get"? Because brides used to be 18-22, and still living at home. Now, most brides are 25+, already on their own, and are combining two households into one. So - they may already have two toasters and not need a third or fourth. Back when it was "get what you get" - most brides went into their new home straight from mom & dads with only the things they were given as gifts to get them started. |
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Lydia
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Sun Jan 27, 2008 5:33 am Post subject: |
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| We didn't use registries. We invited guests to our wedding to witness our vows at the ceremony, and celebrate with us at the reception.Gifts were 'gravy' - and we graciously and gratefully accepted any gifts our guests chose to give us. All were wonderful - from the Tupperware to the outdoor plant pot to the electric frypan to the homemade quilt!Yes, we got a few duplicates - but you know, then you just put that extra coffee maker in storage, and two years later when your coffee maker dies, it's pretty cool to go dig in the basement and pull out a brand new one! We did not return any items, wouldn't have even thought of it! Same with items such as crystal serving pieces, etc. - maybe we didn't use them right away, but were THRILLED to have them as we were more settled and doing more entertaining.Maybe I felt different because I was 28 when we got married - way out of the 'gimme' stage. |
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