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Aren't bridal registries just a glamourized way to panhandle for gifts? Explain.?

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duffnation
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 6:50 pm Post subject: Aren't bridal registries just a glamourized way to panhandle for gifts? Explain.?

Whatever happened to "you get what you get"?

smartypants
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 6:54 pm Post subject:

no. registries are there in case someone wants to refer to them to see what the bride would like. it is completely up to the guest whether to use them or not. it is a convenience, nothing more. it is socially acceptable, and some like it because if they dont know the bride well they know by using the registry they will give her something she will like very much. i have used them with great success, and have ignored them other times when i knew the bride well and bought her something from my heart.

Soon2BMrsGupta
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 6:55 pm Post subject:

I think they help you help the couple. No one wants to spend their hard earned money on a gift that a couple wont use. Not to mention there is no telling what everyone is getting, who wants to be at a bridal shower and be the giver of the 4th toaster being opened?No one said that you have to buy a gift for them, just if you would like to, here is what they really can use.

Orange Kitty
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 6:55 pm Post subject:

We thought about not registering...but both, my mother and my future mother-in-law, explained that it was a good idea to do so if we wanted to get what we really needed/wanted. So, bottom line, I was too scared of getting a hundred "wedding frames"...which I hate, to not register!!I figured that we would still get some things that our family/friends wanted us to have (that we didn't register for), and we did get a few at the shower...but surprisingly, our whole registry was actually bought...Also, I don't mind looking at what other people register for...I would rather buy them something they want than something that will show up at a yard sale or ebay after a couple of months...

Ahni
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 6:56 pm Post subject:

You're not panhandling for gifts since it's assumed you'll get a gift anyway, regardless of whether you have a registry.At least this way they bride and groom get what they need without duplicates or crap. I know I would have been irritated if I had gotten 3 toasters for my wedding. It also cuts down on ridiculous gifts from relatives who haven't seen you for awhile and may think, say, a giant gilt mirror is just what you need when in fact a nice set of pots would be more appropriate. Sometimes "getting what you get" can net you a bunch of junk that just gets passed on.I appreciate registries when I go to weddings, as well, since I know exactly what the bride and groom want and that my gift will be appreciated and not regifted.

lissa
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 6:57 pm Post subject:

yes I think it is I feel the same way about doing it for a house warming or other event. If you don't get what you want then take it back or if the person is unsure then include a gift receipt

April 316
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 6:58 pm Post subject:

A gift registry is a good way to let your guests know the things that are most needed to furnish your new home. It allows them to see what you need, if someone has already purchased the gift you were thinking of and it makes it easier for the guests to select a gift. It's a wonderful and practical idea. Think about it this way, if someone was to get you cotton candy pink dishes and your kitchen is burgundy or hunter green, what are you going to do with those? How do you know where they got them? Even if you do know, will that store let you return it...It's a good way for the bride and groom to get all of the things that they need in the style that they want...what one person thinks is beautiful another thinks is horrible. We all have different tastes...

Rooskie
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 7:01 pm Post subject:

Its just a way for couples to take the "guess" work out buying a gift.

encourager4God
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 7:05 pm Post subject:

Weddings are way over the top and commercialized. My sister was my maid of honor and she asked me what colors I liked for my apartment I loved all the gifts I got and only returned a few so I could get some practical things I need.I think registries are very over priced I always gave cash or a gift certificate. I once looked on a registry for a friend and the CHEAPEST thing was 30.00 I don't even spend that much on a hair cut. You get what you get is best if you don't like it exchange it simple as that. More couples should concentrate on the foundation of a marriage not what gifts they are going to get because that is NOT a reason to get married.

Kitikat
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 7:05 pm Post subject:

I don't think so, now days people are waiting longer to get married and already have some stuff and the registry helps the guests know what to get. I know I sure wish I'd gone with one they maybe I'd not gotten a horrid pink fuzzy toilet seat cover and like three crock pots. I think it's a good idea then you don't get doubles or stuff, when you register you can make the shopping easier.

lilfrisco
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 7:11 pm Post subject:

I know you're asking about registries, but I figured it might help for you to know about the history of the bridal shower (where you get the gifts you register for)."Dating back to the 1860's - The custom of the bridal shower is said to have grown out of earlier dowry practices when a poor woman's family might not have the money to provide a dowry for her, or when a father refused to give his daughter her dowry because he did not approve of the marriage. In such situations, friends of the woman would gather together and bring gifts that would compensate for the dowry and allow her to marry the man of her choice. A frequently quoted legend traces the origin of this practice to sixteenth or seventeenth century Holland. However there are also parallels with many dowry practices and the US Colonial or hope chest (trousseau) custom."

Tracy M
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 7:13 pm Post subject:

No it is more for people who have no clue what to get you and want to purchase something you would really like. Just because you have registered for gifts doesn't mean people are obligated to buy something from the registry.

CindyLu
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 7:14 pm Post subject:

A wedding calls for gifts in the first place so the panhandling aspect is non applicable. A bridal registry lets people get an idea of what you want and it keeps you from getting 5 toasters. If they wan to buy you glasses or china or linen and things like that the registry lets them know what patterns colors styles you want so they do not go and waste their money buying something that does not fit that could wind up on a shelf or worse, re gifted, no one likes that. You need to get a gift for the wedding anyway, why not know what they want?

jlunchbox
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 7:27 pm Post subject:

I don't see it as panhandling. Most people have no idea what to get for people, so they just get something or give cash. If someone is going to get someone something, it may as well be something that they need and want.

nova_queen_28
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 7:28 pm Post subject:

Weddings are an occassion where gifts are given to the couple. I think registries are great ways to give people an idea of what you would like so you don't end up with 4 different toasters in colors that don't go with your kitchen.It gives you a chance to list items you would like and if someone WANTS to buy something for you it is a guide for them in selecting colors, patterns, etc. It also is updated to reflect what people have already purchased for you.

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