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Explain Please...?


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layala
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Feb 14, 2008 9:13 am Post subject: Explain Please...?

So I've been married for 4 yrs, together for 8 yrs, Im 23 and my husband is 23, ut of the yrs we have ben married I've gotten only 1 anniversary gift, and 2 teddy bears for valentines day and like 2 or cards, had to beg him for those things,but its weird cuz on my B-day he acts normal dosen't really say Happy B-day w/o a reminder, dosent say happy anniversary first w/o a reminder Im talkin all day, he dosent want gifts on his B-day , or chrismas thats including me not geetin any gifts last yr was the 1st yr we ever got eachother somethin and my gifts was horrible, but i didn't complain I never do im not pickiy, its weird becuz i got him all the right gifts, and its like he dosen't even think once about gettin me anything for these occasion but i always get him things does he not love me enough whats goin on with him, he says he loves me everyday, great sex laughing talking but its these occassions.I thought maybe it was money but its not we have plenty ive never preasured him till now

mezwood
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Feb 14, 2008 9:16 am Post subject:

Some men are just like that...holidays and birthdays most have not have been a big deal to him growing up.

Kanisha S
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Feb 14, 2008 9:19 am Post subject:

I would Say that you was happy for 4yrs you can be happy with that.

wishingstar5555
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Feb 14, 2008 9:20 am Post subject:

Your going to have to talk to him about it sincerely ! If he just laughs it off or doesnt want to talk about it . Your just going to have to get over the fact you married and insensitive jerk . Just make sure when its time for his birthday or some other occasion just be a jerk like him .

ShanneninGR
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Feb 14, 2008 9:20 am Post subject:

This is just a hunch, but maybe birthdays and anniversaries weren't that special in his family. Some families go all out on birthdays and some may say "Happy Birthday", but don't really do much. I'd stop pressuring him because it will definately make things worse...just be the person you want him to be and eventually he'll get the idea. You gotta train him LOL But training doesn't mean nagging...ok? Training works best with positive reinforcement...

billc4u
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Feb 14, 2008 9:20 am Post subject:

sounds like you are married to a self absorbed man, and that is not easy, if everything else was ok i could probably go with getting my own gifts lol but seriously he does not seem like one of the romantic males the only thing you can do if you love him is to live with it probably will not change in the future unless you can get his mom on your side of things and then i am sure it would change

Just Some Girl
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Feb 14, 2008 9:21 am Post subject:

I know it would be brilliant if he were to get you the perfect gift for every single holiday, but if you have so much more to your relationship, gifts don't mean as much. If you guys talk and laugh and get along great, I think I'd rather have a guy like that than one who picks fights, thinks he's continually right, and gets me great gifts all the time.You say that when you buy him gifts you put thought into it and end up getting him "the perfect gift". Is that what you think or does he tell you it's the perfect gift that you're getting him? Maybe instead of something concrete, he would just like a little bit of the pressure alleviated from him to buy the perfect gift. (I know you said you just recently started pressuring him--I'm not saying you did it the whole time.) When you get him a gift, do you do it because you want him to enjoy the gift or because you want him to get you something just as thoughtful?If you buy him things because you want him to be happy and he is, then continue to buy him things. If you buy him things because you want him to put just as much thought into it when he buys you things, then I would just stop buying him gifts.I don't think it says a thing about how much he loves you--I think his actions (the way he treats you all the other days of the year) speak more loudly than his actions do on holidays.

Beatngu
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Feb 14, 2008 9:23 am Post subject:

So wait.... if he doesn't get you anything or not the "right" gifts, that means he doesn't love you?! How can you put a price tag on love.... Sounds like you're very materialist. I wonder what your husband does for you instead of gives to you... think about that... He may feel that he would rather DO something that give you something with no thought from the store.... GEEZ....

pitchingcoach
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Feb 14, 2008 9:24 am Post subject:

Apparently it's just the way he is. Take care of yourself. Buy yourself a gift. If everything else is good I wouldn't worry about this.

trueeee
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Feb 14, 2008 9:24 am Post subject:

“ . “ It’s called a period. Use it.Some men remember, some men don't. Yours obviously doesn't so its going to be up to you to remind him.

munkypunch
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Feb 14, 2008 9:27 am Post subject:

its the way he was brought up, his parents probably didn't make a big deal about holidays. he doesn't do it on purpose he just doesn't know any better. if he hasn't changed for you in the past 4 years don't expect him to change anytime soon.

Old Man
Yahoo User

Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2008 8:37 am Post subject:

Sorry to say this, but he doesn't think about you like a husband should think about his wife. I buy my wife gifts for no reason.

pawan

Joined: 29 Feb 2008
Posts: 5

Posted: Fri Feb 29, 2008 6:37 am Post subject:

He makes your every day special like a occasion or festival. So, why are you thinking about materialistic things.

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