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Wedding Gift ...?


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confused001
Yahoo User

Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 9:29 am Post subject: Wedding Gift ...?

My cousin is getting married in july and she invited My fiance and my daughter and I. So I was wondering how much money should I give her at the wedding. Her and I are not that close but I am very close to her parents. But for some reason everytime I speak to her mom she drops little hints to me that the wedding is very extravagant and it's $ 90 per head..I'm a single mom of 1 and I do pretty well for myself.Buying a new dress, shoes and doing the same for my daughter is not that bad ,and giving a gift that's affordable. but I just can;t afford to give her $ 500 ..That's way too much. What should I do ?My fiance said he'll give her $ 125 and I should give her $ 150, but her mom is expecting more then that, she said everyone should cover their plate and give $ 150 on top of that , as a gift....

tinktink20
Yahoo User

Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 9:34 am Post subject:

Give her what you can afford.

**ask linda jo....**
Yahoo User

Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 9:36 am Post subject:

give her 100.00 and a nice card.

Teresa M
Yahoo User

Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 9:36 am Post subject:

It's the thought that counts, do what you feel you can do and not worry about it. There's no need to do something that's going to cause you or your daughter to suffer.

LB
Yahoo User

Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 9:38 am Post subject:

You should just pay for your plate. So I would give $270 in a nice card as a gift. That's $90 x 3ppl = $270

Shortie
Yahoo User

Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 9:39 am Post subject:

My wedding is costing even more and I certainly do not expect that much money from people. Give what you can afford. People shouldn't have expensive weddings just to get expensive gifts

AUTIEJELLY
Yahoo User

Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 9:39 am Post subject:

give them what you can afford or a gift card for bath and bodyworks or somewhere else

should be working
Yahoo User

Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 9:40 am Post subject:

well, it's inappropriate for her mother to talk to you about how much the wedding is costing, but it's rule of thumb to spend as much on the gift as you think you'd have to spend to attend the wedding as if you were paying. So if it's $90 a head, then spend about $100 on the gift. The gift spending etiquette depends on where you live....some people say $50 is enough, some wouldn't spend less than $100.

Josette N
Yahoo User

Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 9:41 am Post subject:

Maybe go with a dress, shoes, etc you already own for you and your daughter, and give a gift from her list that is close to what you can afford?I'd spend the money on the cousin if you can rather than a dress... unless you're in the bridal party and forced to buy something to match her theme.The Mom is hinting on the price per head because most people give a gift that is equal (or greater) to the price per-head for the meal/drinks. However, if you are strapped for cash, maybe contact the bride and offer to help her in some way. You may have skills that can offset the cost of a pricey gift that she could really use. One of my bridesmaids is a skilled photographer. Rather than have her take pictures on the Wedding day, she took our engadement photos and made a cute album. She feels a big part of our day, and didn't have to go overboard in spending.Either way, it's the thought that counts. Give from the heart, and I'm sure that she will love it.Good luck!~ Josette ~

Greyhound Mama
Yahoo User

Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 9:43 am Post subject:

How rude of her mom dropping all those hints about how much things cost.I have heard guidelines on the gift covering the cost of the meal and such, but there is no sense in going into debt because of it. A gift is what you freely give, not what someone decides you should. You should give what you can afford, plain and simple. Good luck!

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