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My daughter-in-law is pure evil. What can I do to get my son away from her?

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Anne L
Yahoo User

Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:24 am Post subject: My daughter-in-law is pure evil. What can I do to get my son away from her?

My daughter-in-law is the frigging devil. When she was dating my son, she weasled out of answering any questions I had for her and only would engage in benign pleasantries. She would make excuses not to spend time with me and my hubby alone and would only spend time with me unless my son was with her, and went out of her way to make us all feel uncomfortable in our own home! I made up a guestroom for, but the tramp spend every night in my son's room in MY house. She has never given me or my husband a gift or card of acknowledgement and respect, either. She lured my son to come live in her state, where they were to be married, according to her demands. What about HIS family or HIS state? I protested and they called off their initial wedding plans. Then one day I get a call from my son. He and his wife are going to the JP to get married and they refused to postpone so I could be present. I don't want to be anywhere near that psycho and I don't want to give her the satisfaction of acknowledging that I recognize they live in that state just to spite me, so I refuse to go to their state or visit them and my son has only visited me 1x in 2 years. His wife is evil. She is mean and hateful and abusive to all she meets. She says horrible things about me and my family to my son. She even quit her job to go back to college instead of supporting my son through college like they both agreed on. I told her the time isn't right but she went anyway. And he just puts up with it. She complained about my daily friendly emails and cute pictures I would send in an effort to include her and is doing her best to drive my son away and eventually blocked me from her email because she said to my son that she "doesn't have to deal with me". I'm afraid of her being the mother of my grandchildren - she would be a HORRIBLE mother & would probably keep them from seeing me. My other sons agree that she is crazy and evil and my son knows we want them to break up finally so he can find a woman worthy of him who isn't crazy like this one. I've given him $$ to divorce her, which he has accepted, but they are still together and he has now said that if I don't care about her and respect her, then I don't love him, either, or some nonsense. HELP!

kittykatsback
Yahoo User

Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:30 am Post subject:

Whoa. Sounds like someone has issues.You really don't sound like World's Greatest Mother In Law either..Let your son live his life. I mean maybe he WANTED to get the hell out of "his state."

thknuvu
Yahoo User

Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:31 am Post subject:

There are two sides to every story, have you considered Dr. Phil?

gemmapineiro
Yahoo User

Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:32 am Post subject:

I am not looking forward to the day when my son, my little angel, the one I love the best leaves me for some trolop who keeps him away from me. I feel your pain!!However, I like what your son told you. If you love him, then you should be happy that he's happy.

Heatherrrrrrrr
Yahoo User

Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:33 am Post subject:

She is not pure evil. Spoiled and used to getting her way maybe but not evil. Your son us blinded by this woman. He will not see the truth. The more you push the more they will push back. Don't allow her to hurt your relationship with your son. You can not make your son's choices for him or live his life.

Russian wife.
Yahoo User

Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:33 am Post subject:

Honestly I know you love your son but you have NO buisness getting in the middle of his marriage. He chose his wife and now she comes first before any family. STAY OUT OF IT! I am recently married and my mother in law thinks the same of me. However I don't really care. I married her son becuase we both love each other and support each other. If you keep causing friction, you will only push them farther away and when your grandchildren are born, you may of pushed your daugher in law soo far away that she may not want you to see the children. Losing your child is hard, but he is a grown man and you need to respect him and leave him alone. You are stepping over too many boundries.NOTE: It does not matter what your "other sons say' they are NOT married to her. Leave your son alone and maybe he will come visit "your state" Personally you sound like the MIL from hell.

Frank "CB" Spil
Yahoo User

Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:33 am Post subject:

You want to break them up??? That's a goal in life. Start being nice, and not so twisted. It's a 2 way street.

emilou
Yahoo User

Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:33 am Post subject:

ha ha wow she sounds like a psycho. the best thing you can do is be happy for your son, and if he is happy all is good. if you are ever left alone with the girl or have a chance to talk alone, tell her how you feel. besides that, if your boy is happy thats all you can do

infinite crisis 247
Yahoo User

Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:34 am Post subject:

hmm, that's a lot to get through. however, read over your letter here. it sounds as if you are describing this woman as the antichrist and yourself as St. Jude. i believe that if we got a letter from her, the story would be almost entirely opposite and you would look like the devil. the real trust is probably somewhere in the middle. 1. where is it written that she had to be best friends with you and your family simply because you desired it? a lot of people don't feel comfortable in their in-laws house without their spouse there. maybe she was just shy. you don't know the intricacies of her personality. 2. although you sounds like she has a lot of issues herself, recognize that you do too. i think that the real issue here is that you and she are too alike and this is why you clash. you both sound controlling, manipulative, and petty. you both need to come to some sort of common ground and stop acting like fighting cats. you say that she's crazy. guess what, there might be people out there saying the same about you. 3. your son is a big boy. as much as you might desire that he fall into line and divorce her...he isn't going to do it until he hits his own rock bottom with her (assuming that he is even unhappy in the marriage, which you don't know. only he can answer that). if they have any children, you are going to have to deal with this woman (whether they stay married or not). isnt it better to try to make peace with her now than later. life is too short for all of this.

catTX
Yahoo User

Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:34 am Post subject:

you need to stay out of your sons personal life. why do parents think that they get to live their lives plus their childrens. just be there for him. Unconditional love. Let him make his own mistakes, you are only going to drive him away.

Guys POV
Yahoo User

Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:35 am Post subject:

stop trying to control everything.. it is his decision.. his main focus is his wife.. she may not be used to someone that pushes themselves into their life.. try backing off a bit.. you sound overbearing..

AnJi
Yahoo User

Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:35 am Post subject:

I am sorry that you are going through this...Personally, I would back off. Your son is an adult who has chosen to be with this manipulating woman.Try reverse psychology....Back off and discontinue contact with her. Do not say negative words about her to your son because it is only pushing him closer to her and beneath her spell.Good Luck.

cc
Yahoo User

Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:35 am Post subject:

No wonder. You sound like the Psycho. By the sounds of it no woman would be worthy of your son. Remembre no one is perfect, including you.

Steph L
Yahoo User

Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:35 am Post subject:

Who your son chooses to spend his life with is really none of your business. Maybe you feel the way you do because you no longer can control his life. It sounds to me like you are trying to run his life...demanding that he postpone HIS wedding, complaining about the decisions that they have made as a couple (her going to college), paying him to divorce her...I can imagine why this woman wants nothing to do with you. You have got to let go. Just be happy for your son...as long as he is happy then it shouldn't matter where he lives or who he dates. Keep your feelings about his soon-to-be wife to yourself. If you continue to berate her (to him) then you will push him further away.

moonlighting54
Yahoo User

Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:36 am Post subject:

Sounds to me like you're the one who is pure evil. Nothing you wrote about her convinced me that she was.My son has been dating a girl I don't really like for nearly 5 years but I wouldn't dream on interfering and have never voiced my opinion on his girlfriend. What right have I to do that?We all make our own mistakes (if he is making one). Also haven't you heard that when you try and get people to part, it only makes them stay together? Perhaps if you cool off and stand back and don't do anything it might help. Also you risk losing him and his love forever the way you are badmouthing his wife. Grandchildren? I guess you may never see them if they do have them, not if you carry on in this way.Back off and go and get some counselling.

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