Honeymoon registry? Why is this SO offensive to people?
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MissE
Yahoo User
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 Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 12:35 am Post subject: |
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| Agree with you. Here (Netherlands) it is not uncommon to ask for an evelope (with money) A few of my friends did itA wedding is a big expense and if like you you already have everything once or twice why have a registry?I think your idea is awesome. If that is the reason people would not want to attend your weddig then in my opinion they are not real friends and not worthy of attending anyway as they clearly don't know or understand you.I mean not going to pay for your honeymoon etc Great then you don't have to pay for their expenses attending the wedding (diner, venue drinks etc) |
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mzraerae97
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 12:51 am Post subject: |
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| It's not a a bad idea at all. The bride and groom would still be paying their travel fees which can be just as expensive. I have considered doing it myself, but we have decided to stay close to home so we don't really need one. But, I don't see why it would be a big deal. Guests would be helping with little added perks like maybe a massage or a scuba lesson. It's the same as getting gifts off a registry in my opinion. |
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sparkleythings_4you
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 2:00 am Post subject: |
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| Think of it like this, most people are struggling to pay their own way in this day and age, the cost of living is expensive, I personally had not had a holiday for almost 7 years as I just could not afford to go away anywhere. I would not be happy to pay towards someone going away on an \awesome holiday while I had to stay home for almost an entire decade. I prefer to buy something for the couple that they can use in their house, so they always get store vouchers for wherever they have registered. If it was a honeymmon registry I'd buy them a store voucher anyway |
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oy vey
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 3:53 am Post subject: |
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| I completely agree with sparkley. A honeymoon registry is very offensive. It is very presumptious. If you want flowers for your room, buy them yourself! A honeymoon is not mandatory for any wedding and when you "register" for one it is just freakin' rude. Many people will come and give you money-you just don't ask for it. As for having everything-that is such a load of crap. A bridal shower registry is when you can ask for quality items. Many will pull together and get you items that will last. My husband and I lived together, but after we had our shower we were able to get rid of our crappy stuff and enjoy new things that one, we picked together and two, were of very nice quality that have lasted us now ten years (and now two kids). So if you think you have everything you need to look again. |
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Buzzy Bee
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 5:49 am Post subject: |
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| I hear what you are saying.Honestly I think the idea is fine. Some of our wedding guests will be contributing to our honeymoon if they wish to. All our family and friends know we have been sharing a house together for over 2 years so we have most of what we need. And I know our close family and friends will love to know that their contribution will help us to have the happiest holiday of our lives.I guess some people are just very formal about gifts etc......Try not to let the thumbs down get to you. It's funny how sometimes you give a reasonable answer and you get thumbs down about it. If people don't agree exactly with you they think it is reason to thumbs you down. |
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Crystal_Cutter
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 5:52 am Post subject: |
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| i personally dont see anything wrong with having such a thing because of modern couples having all they need already. ROLL WITH THE TIMES people!! modern days mordern day weddings. this etiquette people follow it totally outdated why should you conform to it when we dont conform to any other social etiquette's anymore?good luck on your wedding and my only advice i9s do it your way and do what makes you happy because you cant please all the people all the time |
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R. B.
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 7:16 am Post subject: |
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| Most people had rather give a gift than a gift card or cash. And a honeymoon registry falls into the "cash" category. Call it stupid, but we act like we don't want people to know how much we spent. It's an long held etiquette issue. Soooooo.....for someone to register for a honeymoon, then it's actually appears that they couple wants donations for the honeymoon. I'm not sure what else it could come across as. If someone already has two households worth of stuff, I'm wondering if there is a possibility of a china pattern that they would like, new towels and sheets since those are always nice to have, or something either of them doesn't have. But, everyone has a different opinion and it's not worth getting upset over. If your guests want to contribute to your honeymoon register, then that's awesome. But if they're hesitant, you might want to have another option for those people. |
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Peachy Keen, Jelly Bean
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 8:44 am Post subject: |
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| The point in a wedding registry is for the couple to register for things they NEED in terms of household items and beginning their lives together. If the couple doesn't need any household items, they shouldn't register. Obviously, the couple doesn't NEED a honeymoon, therefore registering for their guests to contribute to one looks more like they're being cheap and asking for handouts. It's basically the same as a couple asking for cash. Just plain tacky. Honestly, I wouldn't attend a wedding where the couple asked me to help pay for a vacation that I'm not even going on. |
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Michelle J
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 10:06 am Post subject: |
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| I COMPLETELY agree with you! First of all, if I'm going to a wedding, and they don't have a registry, I give a check. If I'm going to a wedding, and forget about ordering online from their registry until the day before the wedding, I give a check. I think registries where you can purchase online and have it sent directly to their house is where it's at! What is the big deal?? I think honeymoon registries are a wonderful idea! A special addition to their honeymoon would be a wonderful way to surprise the bride and groom! I agree with every word you said, and think that the "etiquette" freaks out there need to calm down a bit. And, on another note, if I'm expected to bring a present because they invited me to their wedding, why shouldn't they in turn tell me what they want?? That's MUCH better than them getting 15 silver frames with hearts and their names engraved, which they obviously can't return, as it has their names on it! |
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Sweetheart14
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 11:31 am Post subject: |
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| I just think asking people to contribute to their honeymoon is tacky. If they can't afford to go there on their own dime, then they don't belong going at all...there are plenty of affordable destinations. That's just my opinion...my fiance and I are very traditional and aren't even registering anywhere, so maybe it's just an old fashioned viewpoint. But, as tacky as it may be, nobody is forcing the guests to contribute, so there is no reason to be mad if someone does register their honeymoon...nobody is holding a gun to your head saying you have to contribute to it. |
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