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Is this the same as asking for money?


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RowerGirl
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 11:14 am Post subject: Is this the same as asking for money?

My bf and I aren't going to do a gift registry. We're in our late 20s - he moved out of his parents' home right after high school and I moved out 5 or 6 years ago. We now live together and own everything we need. We both make good money and have no money problems. I don't want to ask for cash (even "through the grapevine"), nor do I want to do a honeymoon registry (we have no problem paying for our honeymoon ourselves). I thought that if people ask our families where we're registered, we might have them suggest the guests make a donation in our names to our favourite charity. We do a lot of work in the community and this is important to us. My friend said it was as good as asking for cash since we're the ones who will get the tax receipt. I hadn't looked at it that way before. Does anyone else agree? If asking for charitable donations is a bad idea, can you suggest something else? We really don't want to do a gift registry.Thank you!

reydi
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 11:19 am Post subject:

That is a great idea - let people know "through the grapevine" that in lieu of gifts you would love donations to your favorite charity - let them know that there will be a station with envelopes that they can put their money in at the reception.

Toot n Come In
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 11:21 am Post subject:

I don't think anyone would be offended at a worthy charity request.

em
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 11:23 am Post subject:

i think that asking for money to give to a charity is a lovely idea, i think that everyone should appreaciate this.

juniejuly
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 11:23 am Post subject:

What you are think is in poor taste. People have their own charities that they give to. No, you would not be able to take it off your taxes.

Ifeelyourpain
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 11:26 am Post subject:

Even if you don't need the gifts or the money, you may want to register for a few small items, like towels and kitchen items, special china, etc. The fact is, people want to honor you as a couple and they may not feel comfortable with the charity idea. You can still give them that option, though.They will probably want to get you gifts anyway -- so unless you want a lot of tacky things you will never use -- register for a few things and call it good. There's nothing wrong with having gift cards to buy what you need later. It's not a bad thing to accept a gift graciously.

My lil voice calls me Isa
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 11:29 am Post subject:

I would much rather give to charity than buy some tacky-assed overpriced bowl the bride will never use.

Marysia
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 11:31 am Post subject:

actually, they can keep the receipt themselves..... it's actually quite common (as common as one in 25 but still....)i think it's lovely and impressive.i know that's not what you were looking for but.... you seem like an outstanding couple who understands it takes more then stuff to make a life.God bless you both!

why?why?why?
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 11:36 am Post subject:

No way is that even close to asking for money...the whole point is that people will feel that sense of obligation to give a gift anyway and what better way to save all who particapate time and money...you avoid the time of choosing things,which can be very inconvienent...guests save time of shopping and can give an amount that is private and still know that they made you guys happy by honoring your request to join in your special day...what a brillant way to give everyone a sense of content to take away with them...usually i just end up with sore feet and a bit of a hangover from a wedding reception,but this would make-up for that in my book...good for you!!! and Mucho Congrats!!

Classy Granny
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 11:43 am Post subject:

Asking for charity donations in lieu of gifts is a wonderful and thoughtful think to do. Who cares who gets the tax write off. I think you deserve it. May the sun shine on your wedding day and may you have many happy years together.

Tracy M
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 11:51 am Post subject:

I would just state on your invitations that you are requesting no gifts however if they would like to make a contribution in lieu of gifts to "XYZ charity" that would be greatly appreciated. I would not ask for the donations to be made in your name so they will get the tax receipt....your charity will end up with the money and that is what is important.

katydint
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 11:53 am Post subject:

Your friends know you and have a good idea of your values. They would likely support your preference to donate a gift to charity. When I filed taxes, I didn't use my receipts from local donations . . . it let me feel like I really gave it freely, as I didn't accept a deduction for them on my tax forms.What about flowers, though? For those who can't feel right without bringing a gift, why not ask for flowers? They're beautiful, smell great, make everybody feel better, are affordable and can be reused (or given away!).Congratulations, may you continue to inspire others with your example.

Sabrina
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 11:56 am Post subject:

I think that is a wonderful idea. At Christmas, etc I always put a request for donations to my favorite charity. Just don't ask for or expect the tax break. That's kinda cheesy (IMO)

Tmarie99
Yahoo User

Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 11:56 am Post subject:

It's not AT ALL the same as asking for cash. Asking for cash means you want money for you. Asking that donations be made in your name/honor to help others is saying, "I appreciate your generosity and want to share with the less fortunate."I would probably donate more than I would spend on a gift if I knew you. You are truly a generous person.

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