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Why would I want to allow cash or gift cards?


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SQ+2
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:35 pm Post subject: Why would I want to allow cash or gift cards?

This is complicated. The non-custodial parent, who has mandatory Court Ordered Supervised Visitation of the children, ages 4 and 6, continues to live in the same household as the children's perpetrator, who is a 14 year old girl. The Court issued a "no contact" court order that was ignored when their father tried to sneak gifts from "her" to the children, hidden inside his gifts, on a previous occasion. The court visitation establishment called me to ask if "cash or gift cards" were ok for their father to bring to the visitation establishment, after I told them that NO gifts were allowed to the children. I did agree to greeting cards, after I stressed they must not be from "her". I couldn't think of WHY it WOULD be ok to give cash or gift cards to a 4 and 6 year old, given these circumstances. Why would I want to allow cash or gift cards? Am I missing something?

LOJunkie
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:40 pm Post subject:

I'm confused. Why WOULDN'T you allow cash/gift cards? If you're allowing greeting cards as long as they are only signed by their father, then why can't he put cash in there as well? I understand that you are dealing with a negative situation, but how could cash/gift cards hurt?

Mama Slu :)
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:41 pm Post subject:

That's really complex. I don't think I understand the whole situation, but that is okay. 4 and 6 year olds don't need gift cards or money period regardless of who is giving.

always b natural
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:42 pm Post subject:

I am with you on this one. The perp has already done enough, with out trying to buy your children. Good luck. This is a tough situation, and your children are hardly more than babies. My heart goes out to all of you.

pandabear
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:43 pm Post subject:

Why not? Use them to buy the children a pair of shoes or an outfit. They don't even need t know it is from "her."

Tom
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:44 pm Post subject:

This post kinda rambles, doesn't punctuate, or really make much sense (children's perpetrator? WTF?). But why WOULDN'T you want gifts for your children? Sounds like he's just being a good dad and you're probably making his life miserable. I should post my ex's number, you guys sound like you'd get along great. But really, I'd relax. A lot of kids don't get anything from dad....

ke
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:47 pm Post subject:

Take a bad situation and make the best of it. Inspect each gift, remove any gift cards. Donate the gift cards to the charity of your choice.

BUBBLES
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:56 pm Post subject:

Why won't you allow the children to recieve gifts from their father? This seem bitter and nasty. Why do you care from her? Did she actually hurt the kids?

pinkpiglet126
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:59 pm Post subject:

I have no idea what on earth "the children's perpetrator" is. However, why on earth wouldn't you want gift cards? You could buy clothes, shoes, school supplies, art stuff, etc. I wouldn't turn down free money!

Zyggy
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 4:03 pm Post subject:

I think you skipped a part of your question, or left it out. I see you have a 14 year old perpetrator, but you don't state what the crime was that committed against the younger children. But I get what you are saying, you don't want the children to have any sort of gift from him, because it could be more from the 14 year old (like bribing, or making her look better) but just giving by the father. He could say "This is from Jane too" So yes, I agree with you, if you are not allowing other gifts, I would say no to gift cards and cash as well for the same reason you don't want other little gifts to be given.

Mandy
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 4:33 pm Post subject:

They are probaly from walmart or some other place like that i am guessing. Since the father can be with the kids he wants to feel like he is helping and giving them something that they want. For example, he prolly meant for them to buy toys or games with the money duhhh. My dad used to do this too.

jennell r
Yahoo User

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 5:54 pm Post subject:

ok... how is the 14 year old girl the perp? im confused.......and why does the dad live with her? how would a 14 yr old even get the money for a gift card?

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