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Baby Cobra's on the Prowl Yahoo User
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 1:36 pm Post subject: What do you think of my poem, P&S people? |
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| Poetry Hides for Me…-In the chirp of the crickets on a warm, summer night.-In the wet licks and nudges from my dog Einstein.-In the crinkle of the wrapper as I open my first Christmas gift.-In the first slurp of my creamy, delicious BK Mocha Joe drink.-In the ring of the bell, signaling an end to a slow, painful day at school.-In the vivid red “A” that gets stamped onto my test.-In the eccentric beat to the song “What Is Love.”-In the shiny, plastic trophies I receive after winning a long, vigorous softball tournament.-In the laughter and exciting moments on those fun Poker night with my friends.-In the slap of the glove against my leg as I pitch another strike.-In the warmth of the sun against my fair skin.-In the numerous inside jokes my friend Laura and I share.-In the blanket pulled ever so closely to my face, protecting me from the thrills of the scary movie.-In the witty, yet slightly annoying, remarks my brother usually exclaims.-In the radiant glow of a sunset.I asked this Question initially in the Poetry part of Yahoo Answerers, but I got no response.So, maybe you could help me out.I did this for a school project..and let me just say, i stink at poetry.So just give your honest opinions about it.Thank you!ooh jk. I did get some response from Poetry secton. its this section that I didnt get much response in.lol but thats ok! =] |
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BREEZY™ Yahoo User
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 1:39 pm Post subject: |
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| ok |
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phatso Yahoo User
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 1:43 pm Post subject: |
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| I didn't like all those "in the" it ruins the rhythm of the poem. try revising without using them but other than that it was alright. |
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Cousin Chopstiks Yahoo User
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:14 pm Post subject: |
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| I LUV IT! |
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Lil Miss Eye for an Eye Yahoo User
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:15 pm Post subject: |
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| I wouldn't change a thing. It's great. |
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Robbie AKA DJ Rabioso Yahoo User
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 pm Post subject: |
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| I loved itA+++ from meeeee =] |
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Alex Yahoo User
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:49 pm Post subject: |
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| It's coolio!!! |
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Eric S Yahoo User
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:56 pm Post subject: |
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| It's pretty good. You put in your own style. The rhythm begins to wander, but other than that I thought it was really good. Excellent use of words. You should consider doing this as a profession. |
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SurferBoy Yahoo User
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 4:36 pm Post subject: |
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| its good how do u like my poem?love lostcan always be foundbut love thrown away can never befound again so hold dearto love |
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Sarra . Yahoo User
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 4:45 pm Post subject: |
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| It's good. Kind of funny too =) |
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Crisp P. Bacon Yahoo User
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Posted: Wed Apr 30, 2008 12:42 am Post subject: |
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| i think its good, i cant do poetry for sh!t so i spose anyones better than me. i hate it when they ask you to write a poem for school cause i seriously cant do it |
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