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Jamie B
Yahoo User
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 Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 11:04 pm Post subject: Do we need to buy a gift for a wedding we're singing in? |
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| My husband and I were asked to sing in a wedding for the daughter of some people we know. They are the kind of friends we say hi to (met them at church) but have never spent time with. We're being paid for singing, but we'll have spent all of it on clothing to wear to the wedding and a babysitter for the rehearsal and the wedding. So should we bring a wedding gift?I didn't mean to insinuate that I was unhappy about using the money for clothes, just that we weren't coming out ahead or anything. I had to buy new shoes, and my husband didn't have anything at all (literally) that fit him for this occasion - he wears jeans and t-shirts to work and needed a shirt and tie for the wedding. And since all grandparents live at least 2 hours away, that wasn't an option. I think the card is a good idea, since we wouldn't have been invited if we hadn't been singing. |
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manstobe92
Yahoo User
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sunny
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 11:11 pm Post subject: |
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| I think a nice card would be sufficient. But then a lot of people are greedy and expect for guests to give them presents (I told people not to give us anything) so maybe ask someone who know them what they think. |
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*saved.....
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 11:11 pm Post subject: |
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i think it'd be nice of u......but maybe just a card wit alot of thought put into it, like wit encouragement and stuff  |
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ashmoontree
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 11:11 pm Post subject: |
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| Maybe just a nice card with your best wishes. If you are going to the wedding to perform, and not just to be a guest, then you shouldn't be expected to bring a gift. If they would not have invited you solely as a guest, don't feel pressured to bring a gift. Your gift is your talent, and that is what they have asked of you. |
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angeldust_599
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 11:14 pm Post subject: |
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| I think since they are paying you then it would be proper of you to give a small gift. especially if you are invited to the reception. if clothing and a babysitter is putting you out financially then you could have refused. |
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rhsaunders
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 11:16 pm Post subject: |
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| No. Hired help (and that includes you) don't contribute gifts. |
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alice-c t
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 11:16 pm Post subject: |
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| NO....you are employees...just smile and enjoy the goings on....be safe |
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Mary Jane S
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 11:24 pm Post subject: |
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| well, no one said to spend the money on clothes, Matter of fact kind of dumb. i am sure you want to look nice, but you can work hard and pull together something lovely from the closet I'm sure. You can't accept the offer to sing and then resent paying for a sitter. it would be considered rude and cheap not to get a gift. You cant even say the singing itself was a gift, because you accepted the money. Perhaps you should have sang for free and you would not be asking this now. I am not trying to come down hard on you but what smart person would take the money and buy clothes? and then be out of pocket for the sitter and the gift? Press something from the closet, sing for free as the "gift", and get gramaw to watch the kids. |
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fizzy stuff
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 11:32 pm Post subject: |
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| They hired you. It would be different if they asked you as friends, or if you offered as a wedding present because they are your friends. But you are just acquiantances at church, and they hired you. No gift required, even if you are invited to the reception too, because the photographer and pastor get a meal too but they are not required to give a gift. A card would be nice, though. |
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jc
Yahoo User
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| Posted: Sat May 10, 2008 1:21 am Post subject: |
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| I think it might be best to do something small, but meaningful to give the couple. Perhaps you can find sheet music of the song you are singing and give it to them in an inexpensive frame or otherwise encased to protect it (maybe laminated and tied with a nice ribbon for their wedding album) --but don't feel you have to spend a fortune to do it. I do think it would be unreasonable for them to expect a lavish gift, however, it is a really special day for them and it really does mean alot to many brides and grooms when someone does something kind to help them remember their wedding day.... |
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